Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!

Saturday at 9am

For a wacky and whip-smart approach to the week's news and newsmakers, listen no further than Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!, the oddly informative news quiz from NPR.

During each fast-paced, irreverent show, host Peter Sagal leads what might be characterized as the news Olympics. Callers, panelists, and guests compete by answering questions about the week's events, identifying impersonations, filling in the blanks at lightning speed, sniffing out fake news items, and deciphering limericks. Listeners vie for a chance to win the most coveted prize in radio: having official judge and scorekeeper Carl Kasell record the outgoing message on their home answering machine.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
7:05 pm
Fri August 8, 2014

John Waters Plays Not My Job

Originally published on Sat August 9, 2014 9:23 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, guys. So this, as we’ve been saying, is our summer pleasure show. And we’ve done the classics. We’ve done baseball, beer, books – what’s left?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Steve Inskeep playing nude shuffleboard.

SAGAL: No.

(LAUGHTER)

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
7:04 pm
Fri August 8, 2014

Gillian Flynn Plays Not My Job

Originally published on Sat August 9, 2014 9:22 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Peter, there’s nothing like a summer read, especially when you’re at a nude beach and a tiny paper is the only thing you have to cover up your bathing tackle.

(LAUGHTER)

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

I need a big dictionary myself.

(LAUGHTER)

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:12 am
Sat August 2, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Mon August 25, 2014 9:53 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, panel, what is the next thing scientists will say is bad for us? Paula Poundstone.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Choral music.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Maz Jobrani.

MAZ JOBRANI: Watching too much Kardashians can lead to talking like this and like this and like this.

(LAUGHTER)

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:12 am
Sat August 2, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Mon August 25, 2014 9:53 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightening Fill In The Blank. Each of our players now has 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can, each correct answer now worth two points. Bill Kurtis, can you give us the scores, please?

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:12 am
Sat August 2, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Mon August 25, 2014 9:53 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
5:01 pm
Fri July 25, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Sat July 26, 2014 10:06 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now panel, what will be that next bit of welcome good news? Brian Babylon.

BRIAN BABYLON: The Gap's going to announce they're going to release a pair of cheap pants for people who are half-ass.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: That would be good news. I would like that. Amy Dickinson.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
5:01 pm
Fri July 25, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Sat July 26, 2014 10:06 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can, each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
5:01 pm
Fri July 25, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Sat July 26, 2014 10:06 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
10:10 am
Sat July 19, 2014

Prediction

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now panel, where will the next giant hole show up? Bobcat Goldthwaite?

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: I'm going to talk about the elephant in the room here.

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: There's a lot of sexual tension between Roxanne and myself.

(LAUGHTER)

GOLDTHWAIT: And it's the hole in my heart - this woman's going to be.

SAGAL: Roxanne Roberts?

ROXANNE ROBERTS: Arizona, where the locals affectionately call it the border tots daycare center.

(LAUGHTER).

SAGAL: And Roy Blount Jr?

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
10:10 am
Sat July 19, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Bobcat has one, Roxanne and Roy are tied with three.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So it's Bobcat.

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: Are you sure? I don't even remember getting one.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
10:10 am
Sat July 19, 2014

Limericks

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

'Cause how often does that happen? Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT ...DON'T TELL ME.

CARLA: Hi.

SAGAL: Hi, who's this?

CARLA: My name is Carla.

SAGAL: Hey, Carla. Where are you calling from?

CARLA: I'm in Charlotte, North Carolina.

SAGAL: Oh, that's awesome. Charlotte is a great place.

CARLA: Woo, I just heard somebody yell.

BOBCAT GOLDTHWAIT: In your house? Get out.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
4:56 pm
Fri July 11, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Sat July 12, 2014 10:23 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
4:56 pm
Fri July 11, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Sat July 12, 2014 10:23 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, panel, whose private letters will embarrass them next? Brian Babylon.

BRIAN BABYLON: All right, they're going to find Harry Potter's private diary where he admits he wanted to be down with Slytherin the whole time.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Woah. Paula Poundstone.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: The von Trapp family will suffer the shame of this release; dear Captain von Trapp, I would like a raise. The kids keep singing. It's really bothering me.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And Mr. Tom Bodett.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
4:56 pm
Fri July 11, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Sat July 12, 2014 10:23 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can - each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Well, Paula has four. Brian and Tom have two.

SAGAL: Oh, my goodness, Paula.

(APPLAUSE)

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Woah.

BRIAN BABYLON: Man.

POUNDSTONE: It's the altitude.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
10:08 am
Sat July 5, 2014

Guess The Newsmaker

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Last year with Paula Poundstone, Maz Jobrani and Faith Salie, we decided to bring back an old game.

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Was it rounders, marbles, kick the can, conkers, memblety peg, huckle buckle beanstalk?

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: No, actually, Bill. Although they all sounds like great fun. Let's let Carl explain.

KURTIS: Guess the News Maker.

SAGAL: So it's time to welcome to our show one Ricardo Baca. Ricardo, welcome to WAIT WAIT ...DON'T TELL ME.

RICARDO BACA: Hey, thanks a lot.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:42 am
Sat July 5, 2014

Bluff The Listener

Originally published on Sat July 5, 2014 10:08 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT ...DON'T TELLME, the NPR News quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. And here's your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill.

(APPLAUSE)

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:23 am
Sat July 5, 2014

Not My Job: Poet Billy Collins Takes A Quiz About Phil Collins

Originally published on Sat July 5, 2014 10:08 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now I end every show by saying this is NPR. And every now and then, we are required by contract to act like we really are NPR.

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: So in 2013, we invited a very classy guest to talk with Peter, Paula, Faith and Tom.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:23 am
Sat July 5, 2014

Actor Tony Shalhoub Takes A Quiz About Nuns

Originally published on Sat July 5, 2014 10:08 am

Because Shalhoub has played a Monk, (the obsessive compulsive detective on the TV series Monk), we're going to ask him three questions about nuns. Originally broadcast March 6, 2010.

Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
4:08 pm
Fri June 27, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Sat June 28, 2014 9:59 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, panel, what will replace biting in the World Cup? Roxanne Roberts?

ROXANNE ROBERTS: They'll rip off their shirts and try to out peck each other.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Shelby Fero?

SHELBY FERO: Just good old-fashioned gummin', man. Pull out those teeth and just go to town.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: (Making chewing sounds). And Luke Burbank?

LUKE BURBANK: I don't know. But please, can it involve Scarlett Johansson's voice?

(LAUGHTER)

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
4:08 pm
Fri June 27, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Sat June 28, 2014 9:59 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Roxanne and Shelby are tied with two. Luke has four.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
4:08 pm
Fri June 27, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Sat June 28, 2014 9:59 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Coming up, it's Lightning Fill In The Blank. But first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call and leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Or click the contact us link on our website - waitwait.npr.org. There, you can find out about attending our weekly live shows right here at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago. And our first-ever show in the wilds of Red Rocks outside Denver, Colorado on July 10.

SAGAL: Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT ...DON'T TELL ME.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
6:05 pm
Fri June 20, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Sat June 21, 2014 9:32 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, panel, what will be the new name for the Washington Redskins? P.J. O'Rourke.

O'ROURKE: Well, they had a 3-13 season last year so - you know, until I considered this question, I never realized just how many words can't be said on radio.

(LAUGHTER)

O'ROURKE: But given the 3-13 season and rebuilding year coming up, I'm saying the Eric Cantors.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Kyrie O'Connor.

O'CONNOR: Oh, given who all works in D.C., I say the Washington Red Faces.

SAGAL: And Maz Jobrani.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
6:05 pm
Fri June 20, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Sat June 21, 2014 9:32 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now onto our final game, Lightning Fill In The Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you please give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: P.J. has one, Maz three, Kyrie four.

SAGAL: Oh, my goodness.

MAZ JOBRANI: Wow.

O'ROURKE: OK.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
6:05 pm
Fri June 20, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Sat June 21, 2014 9:32 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Coming up, it's Lightning Fill In The Blank. But first, it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme. If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Or click the contact us link at our website, waitwait.npr.org. There you can find out about attending our weekly live shows back at the Chase Bank Auditorium in Chicago, Illinois. And our upcoming show is at Red Rocks in Colorado on July 10 and at Tanglewood in Lenox, Massachusetts on August 28. Hi, you're on WAIT WAIT ...DON'T TELL ME.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
3:09 pm
Fri June 13, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Sat June 14, 2014 9:42 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now, panel, who will be the next person to write a giant book no one wants to read? Ophira Eisenberg.

OPHIRA EISENBERG, BYLINE: Monica Lewinsky, and her book is also called Hard Choices.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Brian Babylon.

BRIAN BABYLON: It's going to be Chelsea Clinton with her new mommy book How To Raise A Kid When You Grew Up Broke After You Left The White House.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: And Tom Bodett.

TOM BODETT: Cliven Bundy's groundbreaking treaties Everything I Know About The Negro.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
3:09 pm
Fri June 13, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Sat June 14, 2014 9:42 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS, BYLINE: Tom and Brian each have two. Ophira has four.

SAGAL: Whoa.

(APPLAUSE)

OPHIRA EISENBERG, BYLINE: Whoa.

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
3:09 pm
Fri June 13, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Sat June 14, 2014 9:42 am

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:38 am
Sat June 7, 2014

Lightning Fill In The Blank

Originally published on Wed June 11, 2014 9:16 am

Copyright 2014 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Now on to our final game, Lighting Fill In The Blank. Each of our players has 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill-in-the-blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

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Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:37 am
Sat June 7, 2014

Limericks

Originally published on Sat June 7, 2014 10:39 am

Bill reads three news-related limericks: Manmary Glands, Larger Loafers, Bargain Hunting vs. Bed Hopping.

Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
9:37 am
Sat June 7, 2014

Prediction

Originally published on Sat June 7, 2014 10:39 am

Our panelists predict the new system for identifying hurricanes.

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