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Lightning Fill In The Blank

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

It is now time to move on to our game, Lightning Fill in the Blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions as he or she can. Each correct answer is now worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores?

BILL KURTIS: Jessi has three; Paula and Tom are tied with two.

SAGAL: All right. We have flipped a coin. Tom has elected to go first. So, the clock will start when I begin your first question, Tom. Fill in the blank. Officials said that the 7.6 magnitude earthquake that hit off the coast of blank Wednesday caused relatively little damage.

TOM BODETT: Costa Rica.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday a federal judge ruled that police in blank can require people to show their papers to prove their immigration status.

BODETT: Arizona.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: On Thursday, a jury in Illinois convicted retired police officer blank of killing his third wife.

BODETT: Oh, the Peterson guy.

SAGAL: Yeah, Drew Peterson.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Park rangers said that up to ten thousand people may have been exposed to hantavirus during visits to blank National Park.

BODETT: Yosemite.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A farmer in Germany blames the bird seed he planted for his crop of blank.

BODETT: Oh, he grew some pot.

SAGAL: He grew 10-foot tall marijuana plants.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: In a bid - just the birds. In a bid to get a bigger share of the tablet computer market, on Thursday Amazon released a new version of the blank.

BODETT: I'm guessing an iPad.

SAGAL: No, it's called the Kindle Fire when Amazon makes it.

BODETT: Oh, Amazon.

SAGAL: Yeah.

BODETT: Oh yeah, I heard Apple. Do over.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Vanity Fair magazine made headlines with an article that says scientologists held auditions to find blank a girlfriend.

BODETT: Oh, Tom Cruise.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Three years after making headlines for boldly ceasing to use models in favor of real women, this week the fashion magazine Brigitte in Germany announced it would blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

BODETT: Use models.

SAGAL: Exactly right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Turns out, since the first no models issue hit newsstands in January of 2010, editors have had a really hard time finding real women who are pretty enough, thin enough and non-mustachey enough.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: They had good intentions; the problem was they made the announcement having never seen a real woman.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: You know, they're used to models. The first real woman came in and they're like, my god, how many of you are in that dress?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Tom do on our quiz?

KURTIS: Tom got seven right, for 14 points, for a total of 16, to take the lead.

SAGAL: Well done, Tom.

PAULA POUNDSTONE: Whoa, Tom, that was great.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: Paula, you are up next. Paula, you're up next. Fill in the blank. Pentagon officials said this week that the book by a Navy SEAL about the raid that killed blank contained classified information.

POUNDSTONE: Osama bin Laden.

SAGAL: Right

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In a court filing this week, the Justice Department accused BP of gross negligence and willful misconduct that led to the oil spill in the blank.

POUNDSTONE: In the gulf.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: The Dallas Cowboys beat the New York Giants in Wednesday's game, kicking off the start of the blank season.

POUNDSTONE: NFL.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Self-proclaimed messiah and founder of the Unification Church Reverend blank died at age 92 in South Korea last Sunday.

POUNDSTONE: Moon.

SAGAL: What?

POUNDSTONE: Moon.

SAGAL: Yes, Reverend Moon.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: A New Jersey man was arrested for drunk driving this week after telling a policeman that his birthday was blank.

POUNDSTONE: Today.

SAGAL: February 31st.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This week Bob Barker told the AP that he was totally fine with CBS' decision to exclude him from the special celebrating the 40th anniversary of blank.

POUNDSTONE: "The Price is Right."

SAGAL: Yeah.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Hundreds of soldiers posted naked pictures of themselves on Facebook to support blank in the wake of his Las Vegas scandal.

POUNDSTONE: Prince Harry.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Fashion designer Jill Sander just unveiled her new $300 bag which is in fact a blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

POUNDSTONE: A bag.

SAGAL: Well, specifically, it is a brown paper lunch bag.

POUNDSTONE: Wow.

SAGAL: If you think the generic brown paper bag you normally carry to work doesn't do your caviar sandwiches justice, you might consider the "Vasari" bag. Now if $300 dollars sounds like a lot to spend on what is a brown paper bag, keep in mind it comes filled with $299.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Bill, how did Paula do on our quiz?

KURTIS: She got six right, for 12 points, a total of 14. But Tom still has the lead.

POUNDSTONE: Wow.

SAGAL: All right.

BODETT: Bring it, Jessi.

SAGAL: Here's the math question. How many does Jessi need to win this quiz?

KURTIS: Jessi needs seven.

SAGAL: Seven.

JESSI KLEIN: I'm concerned because I think you've asked everything I know.

(LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: But I'm going to do my best.

BODETT: That's why I went first.

SAGAL: This is for the game, Jessi. The U.N. announced that more than 100,000 people have fled from blank in August, the highest total since the violence there started.

KLEIN: Syria.

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A spokesman for the family of pioneering astronaut blank said Thursday that he will be buried at sea.

KLEIN: Neil Armstrong.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: In order to avoid a conflict with President Obama's convention speech, MTV changed the time of the blank.

KLEIN: The VMAs.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: A Bank of America executive lost out on a multi-million dollar bonus, after a court ruled it was wrong of him to have blanked.

KLEIN: Gotten that bonus.

SAGAL: Mooned his bosses in a meeting.

KLEIN: I'm glad I didn't know that.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Actor Michael Clarke Duncan, best known for his Oscar nominated performance in the movie blank, died at age 54.

KLEIN: "Green Mile."

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Newsman Tom Brokaw was hospitalized briefly after becoming lightheaded after taking half a dose of blank.

KLEIN: Ambien.

SAGAL: Right.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: Scientists in Hong Kong announced they'd figured out they can make laundry detergent and plastics out of excess blank.

(SOUNDBITE OF GONG)

KLEIN: Excess hand soap.

SAGAL: No, out of excess Starbucks coffee grounds and muffins.

KLEIN: Boo.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Sure, some people are skeptical this could work, but those people have probably never actually eaten a Starbucks muffin.

(LAUGHTER)

KLEIN: Who figured that out?

SAGAL: Scientists in Hong Kong.

BODETT: Baristas on break.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Hey Bill, did Jessi do well enough to win?

KURTIS: She needed seven, she only got five. We'll subtract that from her SATs.

(LAUGHTER)

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: So what does this mean?

KURTIS: This means our winner, at 16, is Tom Bodett.

POUNDSTONE: There it is.

(APPLAUSE)

BODETT: Thank you. Thank you very much.

SAGAL: Well done, Tom.

(SOUNDBITE OF MUSIC) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

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