Ask Me Another
2:11 pm
Thu April 11, 2013

The Hokey Pokey

Originally published on Fri April 12, 2013 8:18 am

Transcript

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

We have our first two fabulous contestants: Caroline Blanchard and Jason Salisbury, standing at the puzzle podiums. Welcome.

CAROLINE BLANCHARD: Hello.

JASON SALISBURY: Thank you.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Now, it turns out the two of you are married, even though you changed your last names, clearly for the point of this show.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: So, and you have a longstanding trivia partnership as well as nuptial partnership.

BLANCHARD: Probably longer trivia than nuptial, but, yes.

SALISBURY: Yeah.

EISENBERG: That's how the fire of the marriage started wasn't it?

BLANCHARD: The nerdy fire.

EISENBERG: The questions. Jonathan, our first game is called The Hokey Pokey. So I'm guessing this is a geography anagram game that involves math or something like this.

JONATHAN COULTON: I don't know why you would guess that. This is actually a tribute to that classic beloved song, "The Hokey Pokey."

EISENBERG: Oh.

COULTON: Every answer is a two-word phrase in which both words rhyme, like hokey pokey. I will sing you the first two lines and then you sing the third line, using the answer phrase. For example...

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: You're a Nabisco snack in a peanut shape. You are a sandwich cookie with a rich peanuty taste.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

EISENBERG: You do the Nutter Butter and you turn yourself around.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Hey, that's what it's all about.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: I should say that if you are listening at home, you can sing along with the "that's what it's all about" part. Please, don't do it if you're listening on the subway because people will think you are crazy.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: And contestants, the winner of this round will move on to our Ask Me One More final round at the end of the show.

BLANCHARD: You're going down.

SALISBURY: Toast.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: Trash talking already and we haven't even started.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: You take your doggy out. You let him do his thing. You have to pick it up, so this is what you sing.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Caroline?

BLANCHARD: All I can think of, the poopy sack.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Jason?

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

SALISBURY: You do the pooper scooper and you turn yourself around.

EISENBERG: Oh, stole it.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Hey, that's what it's all about.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: That's good. Caroline, poopy sack does not rhyme, those two things.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: The Andrew Sisters' song Bette Midler sang with joy, about the bugle boy and the style he employed.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Caroline?

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

BLANCHARD: Something about the boogie woogie bugle boy of Company B.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I mean, those are all correct words. If you would like to put them in the style...

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

BLANCHARD: He does the boogie woogie and he turns himself around.

EISENBERG: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Hey, that's what it's all about.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: We got there. We got there.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: You turn the handset on. You push the button down. You radio your friends from anywhere in town.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Jason?

SALISBURY: You do the walkie talkie and you turn yourself around.

EISENBERG: You sure do.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Hey, that's what it's all about.

(APPLAUSE)

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Your bills are counterfeit, so let's make no mistake. You made them all yourself and they're absolutely fake.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Jason?

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

SALISBURY: You do the funny money and you turn yourself around.

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Hey, that's what it's all about.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: I just want to point out, you should not try this at home because I have a B.A. in music. So, it's the only reason I'm able to get through this very difficult song.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: M.A., if you have an M.A., absolutely not.

COULTON: No, an M.A. won't do it. It has to be a B.A.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: Your husband's far away. The milkman's here today. You lead him up the stairs and undo your negligee.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Come on, married couple.

COULTON: We're not endorsing this sort of behavior, you understand.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Caroline?

BLANCHARD: You do the milky wilky.

EISENBERG: Milky wilky.

BLANCHARD: Cheese. Is it cultivated? Does it have...

COULTON: That is not what it's all about, Caroline.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: I like that you lead him up the stairs, undo your negligee and then there's cheese involved.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Yes, Caroline?

BLANCHARD: The dreamy creamy.

EISENBERG: Dreamy creamy.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: All right, let's see if anyone out there knows.

(SOUNDBITE OF AUDIENCE YELLING)

EISENBERG: The hanky panky.

BLANCHARD: Oh, it's a real thing.

COULTON: Oh, boy.

BLANCHARD: How does that relate to dairy?

EISENBERG: It doesn't. That was your brain doing the diary part.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I guess it's true; milkman is a little specific. It could be anybody.

(LAUGHTER)

(SOUNDBITE OF SINGING)

COULTON: You take a rabbit out. You make it disappear. You say the magic words and this is what we hear.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

EISENBERG: Caroline?

BLANCHARD: Hokey pokey. Oh, no, hocus pocus. Hocus pocus.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Hocus pocus, there you go. Well done. It turns out Jason is the winner of this round, and he will be moving on to our Ask Me One More final showdown at the end of the show. What a delightful couple. They're hugging and kissing. Well played. Thank you so much.

(APPLAUSE) Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.